Starting Over


Today I was working on a quilt and had to rip out the same seam four times because my sewing machine kept knotting up. I never got very far, so the ripping out wasn't a big deal. The frustration came in having to start over, and over, and then over again. Finally, I figured out what the problem was and finished sewing that seam.

How many times in life do we feel like we are starting over? Is this a good feeling or not?

Some times we are starting over on a small project or portion of our life, like my sewing project, or when my husband is trying to fix the car. Other times, we are starting over on a huge part of our lives, a new marriage, a new child, looking for a new job. Every time we start over, there are frustrations. Sure, a new marriage or a new child is joyful, but there are always frustrations in the adjustments this event takes. A new job is exciting, but yet angst-filled and possibly nerve-wracking. If you didn't choose to look for a new job (downsizing or other reasons), it is especially frustrating to feel like you are starting all over again.

Some projects allow you time to step back, breathe, and come back later when you aren't frustrated. Other times you don't have this opportunity. Or do you? I think we always have this opportunity, we just don't take the time or have the right outlook. Starting over presents you with opportunities, you just have to look for them.

A new job gives you the opportunity to learn new skills, meet new people, possibly hone it into a position that fits your skills. Even if you didn't want to leave your old job, there were certainly things that you might have been unhappy with, or bored with, and this new job can offer a chance to change that. Moving to a new city usually means having to start over at making friends. This is especially hard for children who miss their old friends terribly. Taking the time to acknowledge that, and then look for the fun, positive characteristics in the new people they meet can help.

Take the time to step back and breathe. Take the time to look for the opportunity you have in starting over. Take the time to acknowledge that it is frustrating to start over, but it is also a chance for better things to come. My sewing project? Had I taken the time to breathe and come back to it later, I would have realized the joy I feel when I create something from fabric. I lost that joy by being frustrated at having to start over. What joy do you lose by giving into the frustration of having to start over?

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